Remus, Sirius and the Lost Opportunity
by Minnow
Summary: Sirius interrupts Remus’s reading, with fatal consequences.


**Remus, Sirius and the Lost Opportunity by Minnow**

**Disclaimer: **These characters belong to J.K. Rowling and various publishers and corporations. If they were mine, they would be living happily ever after.  
**Era:** Marauders, c. Sixth Year.  
**Summary: **Sirius interrupts Remus's reading, with fatal consequences.  
**Rating: **PG-13  
**AN: **After a weekend of wall-to-wall Sirius/Remus fic, I was seriously depressed because it all ends so badly -- in canon, anyway. Two fics in particular, All Dogs Go by Kimiko and Christmas 1977 by Thistlerose, actually had me in floods of tears. So this heavily ironic little piece had to happen. It didn't cheer me up, but at least I can now blame Sirius for everything going wrong.

**Remus, Sirius and the Lost Opportunity  
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'Reading again?'

Remus turned the page, so absorbed in his book that he didn't even hear the question.

'Moooony!' Sirius pulled the novel out of his friend's hands. 'This is a really bad habit, you know. It'll make you go blind.'

'No, Padfoot, that's wanking, not reading. Now, give my book back. C'mon, I mean it. Or I'll never talk to you again.'

'You never talk that much anyway. Not to me. Always got your head stuck in a book.' Sirius examined the cover. 'What the hell is this anyway? _Harry Potter and the Prisoner_ _of_ _Azkaban_. Muggle rubbish. Children's rubbish, too.'

Remus flushed slightly. 'It's not rubbish, it's brilliant. And it's not just a children's book. Well, the subtext is fairly adult. If you ask me.'

Sirius flicked through it idly. 'Hey, Moony, there's a character called Remus Lupin in this! Listen to this – 'Professor R. J. – '

Remus growled. 'I KNOW, Sirius. I read that bit already. There's also a character called Sirius Black, who's a mass murderer. There's James and Lily Potter, but they're dead.'

'Oh, now I know this is rubbish! You've Transfigured your spell book, haven't you? Lily won't even speak to James.'

'Well, she does here. Or did, because she's dead. And I'm just about to find out what happens to Sirius and Lupin, well, me and you, in the Shrieking Shack.'

Sirius leant over and murmured in Remus's ear: 'That is _not_ suitable for children, Moony. Oh, no, don't get all huffy! I'm not talking about the transformations. I'm talking about -- '

'I know, I know.' Remus went bright red. 'Look, Padfoot, if you would just let me have that back for a moment. I have a feeling it's important. I mean, maybe it's prophetic, and all these things really will happen to us. 'Cept me being a Professor.' He giggled. 'Like I'd ever do that!'

Sirius held the book high in the air. 'Prophetic, mate? Since when could you do Divination? Oh, I get it. It's not your spell book that got Transfigured.' He took out his wand and chanted 'Regresso'.

When the novel failed to turn back into Remus's barely-opened copy of _Future Perfect: a Guide for Young Seers,_ Sirius shrugged, and, still holding the book just out of Remus's reach, he intoned, 'I am the Seeing Eye, and I guard the gate to What Will Be.'

'It's not Transfigured, you moron,' Remus pointed out.

'Do you want me to Transfigure it, then? How about a nice wizard's guide to unspeakable practices?'

Remus lost patience. 'Oh, all right, Sirius! At least keep my place. Lupin's just burst into the Shrieking Shack.'

Sirius was all smiles. 'Fine.' He tossed the book down on to the floor, and nuzzled up to Remus. 'Mmm, Moony. You smell totally delicious. Talking of the Shrieking Shack, we've got an hour till dinner, and stupid old Prongs has left his Invisibility Cloak on his bed.'

Remus melted. 'Okay. Let's go.'

They didn't come back to Gryffindor Tower till much later, and went straight up to bed.

The next day, Remus came down early, and searched for his book, but couldn't find it anywhere. He was roundly cursing the house-elves, when Sirius bounded into the common room and smothered him with kisses. 'Good morning, Moonbeam! Or should that be Sunbeam? What're you so grumpy about?'

'My book. It's gone.'

'Oh, never mind, Moony, it'll turn up.'

'I really, really wanted to know what happened next. It was about us, Padfoot! I told you.'

'Well, it wasn't my fault. And you reading a book is hardly going to save the world, is it?'

''Spose not. But I'd like to have found out – '

'What happened. Well, next time look at the end first. That's what I always do. Saves you having to read the rest. Come on, I'll race you to breakfast.'

**End**


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